ABOUT

ABOUT

I was a poised, powerful, and confident woman … until I went on a date.

In fact, I’m a wee bit embarrassed to tell you what I put myself through the day I went on my first post-divorce date—four long years after my paperwork had been signed.

We were scheduled to meet for dinner. About 2:00 in the afternoon, my anxiety kicked in as I began to go through my wardrobe.

I put on nine different outfits. Spent 20 minutes with each one, critiquing myself in the mirror and fantasizing how each accessory might influence my date’s reaction to me. Are these earrings too big? Is peach too demure? What about my neckline, too much cleavage … not enough?

Then I went through it all again with all manner of hair and makeup possibilities.

By the time I arrived at the restaurant I was exhausted. I felt like I’d already been on fifty dates that day … and I had been rejected on most of them.

As far as the actual date, it was not just our first. It was our last. I can’t remember his name, or anything we talked about, but I do know I looked good. At least I thought I did.

Sadly, this exhausting scene played out over and over again … until I made a major shift in how I dated …

I began to partner with the Divine.

Once I did this, I deepened my ability to love myself and also found the courage to unapologetically express my wants and needs. From this newfound inner strength, I approached dating feeling a combination of fearlessness and deep trust. I literally quit caring what these men thought of me. I became wildly detached and I welcomed rejection. In fact, I no longer saw it as a “rejection.” I genuinely saw it as God’s protection.

Because I learned how to lean on God and not my small, scared ego, I got better and better at showing up as my authentic self in this new world of dating. One of the ways I did this was by letting go of focusing on them and instead focusing on me and what I wanted.

Eventually, over time, I mastered expressing my truth, wants and needs in other areas of my life; and my whole life transformed. I was able to do this because I knew:

something WAY bigger…had my back.

Fast forward a couple of years. I had a date, a new man. We agreed to meet at a Starbucks. I was encouraged when I first saw him. Finally, a guy who looked like his dating profile picture. Hallelujah!

The conversation was easy. I felt relaxed, even hopeful. Then he asked, “What books have you been reading?”

My first instinct was to pick something mainstream. I struggled to remember a best-seller I had glossed over and returned to the rack at Barnes and Noble.

Instead, I heard a voice in me say, No Vickie, you’re not going to turn your back on who you are so this guy will like you. No matter how good looking he is.

“A New Earth by Eckart Tolle,” I answered.

After I explained to him the premise of the book, he leaned backwards slightly and said, “Oh, so you are one of those New Age types?” with a tinge of disgust.

I felt a burning sensation well up in me. It was a combination of fear of rejection coupled with an extreme desire to people-please. I was tempted for a millisecond to give him the answer that would keep me from being rejected … but just for a millisecond. At that very moment, I felt the voice of my authentic self roar up and say, Oh hell-to-the-no Vickie! Not after all this work, not after all you have been through are you going to give this guy the answer HE wants to hear!

“Yes,” I answered.

He said, “You mean like … like chanting and … meditating and crystals and all that stuff?”

I leaned back in my chair, put my hand on the table and braced myself for the inevitable. “Yep, that’s me.”

Practically before I could get my words out he said (with increasing disgust), “Then we are not going to be a match.”

“Apparently not,” I shot back, with a confidence that startled him.

I skipped to the parking lot. My authentic self was doing inner cartwheels. Once in my car, I screamed, “Yes, yes, yes you did!” That day, I crossed a threshold. I showed up on every date 100% my authentic self … never to return.

 
 

The thing that gave me the confidence to do this?

Partnering with the Divine

In my years of coaching, I have found that even people who are already on a spiritual path can struggle with this. I considered myself to be a very spiritual person. I prayed, meditated and even got my Masters degree in Spiritual Psychology. What I hadn’t done, was put God in the driver’s seat when it came to dating. I would do my spiritual practices in the morning and then, when I logged onto that dating app, I was on my own. My ego took over. Spirit was nowhere in sight.

Eventually though, I learned this truth:

It’s not enough to be your authentic self, and love yourself …

(though those are a great start!)

You must learn how to partner with the Divine

if you want to experience deep peace and find your true Soul-Mate.

And I did eventually find true love and not just any love, but a soulmate. A man who gets me at the deepest level, sees me and adores me.

I want this for you.

I hope you will join me on an upcoming webinar or apply for an Exploratory Coaching Session with me and learn what it takes to live in a state of trust and surrender as you call in your soulmate. I look forward to supporting you on your path of calling in lasting love.

Please know this … it is possible!

 

The thing that gave me the confidence to do this?

Partnering with the Divine

In my years of coaching, I have found that even people who are already on a spiritual path can struggle with this. I considered myself to be a very spiritual person. I prayed, meditated and even got my Masters degree in Spiritual Psychology. What I hadn’t done, was put God in the driver’s seat when it came to dating. I would do my spiritual practices in the morning and then, when I logged onto that dating app, I was on my own. My ego took over. Spirit was nowhere in sight.

Eventually though, I learned this truth:

It’s not enough to be your authentic self, and love yourself …

(though those are a great start!)

You must learn how to partner with the Divine

if you want to experience deep peace and find your true Soul-Mate.

And I did eventually find true love and not just any love, but a soulmate. A man who gets me at the deepest level, sees me and adores me.

I want this for you.

I hope you will join me on an upcoming webinar or apply for an Exploratory Coaching Session with me and learn what it takes to live in a state of trust and surrender as you call in your soulmate. I look forward to supporting you on your path of calling in lasting love.

Please know this … it is possible!

Vickie’s Professional Bio


Vickie Falcone, M.A. is a Soul-Centered Relationship Coach who leads groups and works one-on-one with spiritual women who want to attract their Soulmate. Through her program, participants are transformed, leaving with the inspiration, wisdom, and ongoing skills to call in lasting love.

She began her career over 25 years ago as a parenting speaker, workshop leader, and coach. After a decade of leading parenting workshops and keynote speaking at parenting conventions, she authored the book Buddha Never Raised Kids and Jesus Didn’t Drive Carpool: Seven Principles for Parenting With Soul and created the program Parenting That Works!: How to Get Kids to Listen and Cooperate. Her soon-to-be-released book is titled, Heal from the Affair: A Spiritual Solution to Overcoming Betrayal.

Vickie holds a Masters Degree in Spiritual Psychology and a Coaching Certification from the University of Santa Monica.

She considers her biggest accomplishments to be the close, connected, authentic relationships she has created with her children and her Soulmate and husband, Paul. She and Paul live in Los Angeles with their two rescue kitties, Flo and Duke.

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